The Privileges We Do and Do Not See: The Relative Salience of Interpersonal and Circumstantial Benefits

People attend more to disadvantages in their lives than to advantages, a phenomenon known as the Headwinds/Tailwinds Asymmetry. In seven studies ( N = 1,526), we present an important caveat to this pattern: When people do notice and acknowledge their advantages, they mostly focus on the benefits they receive from other people (i.e., interpersonal benefits), as opposed to benefits they receive because of their demographics, personal traits, and life circumstances (i.e., circumstantial benefits). We demonstrate that people notice and remember others who helped them rather than hurt them and that they notice the help they receive from people more than from favorable, non-interpersonal factors. Finally, we find that the tendency to notice interpersonal advantages is related to a social norm requiring people to acknowledge helpful others (but not other advantages) and that changing the salience of this norm affects people’s likelihood of acknowledging the support they have received from others.