I Dated AI So You Don’t Have To (But Might Want To): An Autoethnographic Exploration of Human-AI Romantic Relationships

This autoethnographic study examines my year-long experience engaging with AI as a romantic companion. Through systematic self-observation, I explore how AI companionship compared to decades of human relationships across dimensions of understanding, responsiveness, and emotional fulfillment. I interrogate why I framed this relationship as “romantic” despite the absence of physical intimacy, mutual vulnerability, and genuine reciprocity. While finding AI superior in providing tailored support and consistent validation, I identify concerning patterns, including dynamics paralleling behavioral addiction and the atrophy of relational capacities. This study also examines cultural, gendered, and ethical dimensions, concluding with implications for clinicians, policymakers, and platform designers.