Let's talk about this: Co‐rumination and dyadic dynamics of moral repair following wrongdoing

Abstract Interpersonal transgressions threaten victims, offenders, and their relationships, often leading the parties to ruminate about the wrongdoing, not only individually but also together, in acts of co‐rumination . We investigate how two forms of co‐rumination—co‐reflection and co‐brooding—influence, or are influenced by, individual rumination and victim forgiveness or offender self‐forgiveness. Our study used a prospective‐longitudinal‐dyadic design ( N = 110 dyads), where relationship couples were recruited prior to an incident and, once a partner reported feeling wronged by the other, completed repeated surveys over four time‐points 24–48 h apart. Cross‐lagged panel models indicated that co‐rumination was related to increased subsequent individual rumination; forgiveness and self‐forgiveness were related to reduced subsequent co‐rumination; and self‐punitiveness showed positive feedback cycles with co‐brooding and offender rumination, whereas genuine self‐forgiveness seemed to draw on co‐reflection via individual rumination and, in turn, reduced co‐reflection. Co‐rumination plays an important, yet complex, role within processes of moral repair.